Think Before You Swipe: Dating in the Age of Hyper Selection

You’ve tried bookstores, and bars, and coffee shops, and gyms, you still can’t seem to find a worthy date. But have you thought of looking online? It’s fun to keep on swiping right for potential matches. But like any other form of social media, remember that there are certain pros and cons to using dating apps. 


Swipe right if you like them. Swipe left if you don’t! Now, if only dating is as no-brainer as that set of instructions. Finding love through dating apps may seem fun, and liberating, and exciting but it can also be tedious and frustrating, especially when you end up finding more frogs than princes/princesses.

Before you put yourself out there via dating apps, remember this: you will not be getting the real deal all the time. Here are some dating app truths that will help you navigate love in the time of the Internet.

Matched does not always equate to a match.

Matching on dating apps is based on algorithms generated from your preferences, interests, and personality. But just because you like watching the same TV programs or a person fits your ideals does not mean you guys are a match made in online dating heaven. There are factors that only a face-to-face encounter will be able to determine. So manage your expectations. A dating app will not give you Mr. or Ms. Right at first go.

You still need face-to-face interactions.

Being matched is just the first step. Follow that up with a date where you can get to know each other better. This is your opportunity to ask questions about their likes and dislikes, and determine if they are someone you’d want to hang out with. If not, you can avoid getting matched again with that person by blocking him/her. It’s not the most ideal set-up but dating apps are meant to be efficient, even if it stings.

People might not tell the whole truth.

The truth is this: You don’t really know who it is you’re talking to and if they are even telling you who they really are. Accept that as a possibility. It’s very easy to falsify information when you have a screen name, a bio, and a profile pic to hide in. People have been known to hide their real marital status, post the picture of another person, and pretend they are interested in things they actually hate. You might be talking to someone who is jobless and living in their parents’ home and you’ll have absolutely no idea!

Despite these things, people still try their luck with dating apps. Finding love is hard and complicated. But if it will take you straight to your one true love, what’s another set of complications, right?